To help America make sense of the knuckledraggers, many in wealthy Southern California, who are staging cute “Tea Party” demonstrations (against Obama’s tax-reform plans to get us out of the Bush Depression), we have assembled the following “Top 10 Reasons NOT To Pay Taxes.”

Along with bonehead right-winger Rupert Murdoch, the deep-thinkers who promote this stuff presumably want a nice, old-fashioned “flat tax” and maybe still believe the Earth itself is flat. In case you never studied recent American history, “flat tax” means that the wealthy who will soon own pretty much everything would only have to pay the same tax rates as everyone else — the poor, the minimum-wagers, union members, and the middle class. Clueful voters and modern economists long ago lost all respect for that old flat-tax religion, but conservative (and rich!) Republicans cling to that pagan faith. As for the Earth being flat — oh, hell, if you never leave the safety of your country-club, the Earth DOES look flat.

“Top 10 Reasons NOT To Pay Taxes”
from DIOSA.NET/circus

Reason #10 – In the beginning, God made Man and Woman. There were no taxes, just that liberal Serpent. End of discussion.

Reason #9 – Hey, if those huge corporations who didn’t pay royalties for leased Federal offshore oil-fields (during the carefree Bush years) weren’t arrested, shouldn’t the government cut me some slack too?

Reason #8 – All those do-gooders just want to pay out our money for Federal “entitlements” like Medicare/Medicaid and Social Security. Forget all those old and sick people. Instead, take care of traditional charities like the Pentagon and defense contractors (I own stock in those).

Reason #7 – I promise never to call the police, the fire department, the local school district, the Coast Guard, National Guard, highway-repair department, hospitals, National Park Service, or any other wasteful government office. So I deserve an exemption from taxes.

Reason #6 – I’m from Indiana and can’t remember what the question was. Can I be excused?

Reason #5 – The rebel yell at the original Boston Tea Party was “no taxation without representation!” I haven’t voted in years. So “no taxation” for me, right?

Reason #4 – The guy in the White House doesn’t even look like me. Wrong color. Doesn’t represent me at all. So, again, “no taxation” for me.

Reason #3 – I’m pretty sure there’s no house of representatives in Washington-DC to authorize Federal budgets and taxation, and anyway Dick Cheney proved we can bend the laws and even torture people when we feel like it (he even shot a lawyer and got away with it).

Reason #2 – The government has enough money, so they don’t need mine.

Reason #1 – If the government taxes rich people, we won’t have enough of them, and only poor people will be left.

– Matthew Walker

This entry was posted on Thursday, April 30th, 2009 at 2:02 am and is filed under Money, Society. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can skip to the end and leave a response. Pinging is currently not allowed.